TORONTO, ONTARIO, CN (November 26, 2011)- As he sits alone, crouched inside a cold, dark, 6 by 8 foot cell in a run down building outside Toronto, Doit 49 ponders why he is in this dank little room and why there is a lock on every door with gunmen waiting outside.
"I just blacked out one day after a racing some DTR2, and bam, I wake up in this dump," said the disillusioned racer, and apparent criminal. "No TV, no computer, nothing. Hell, I don't even have a kitchen to make breakfast in like back home. I just wish I could get out of here!"
Doit 49 has said he is suing "whoever the hell put me here" for their inhumane treatment which he says involves locking him in a caged room for hours on end with only brief stays outside the room that include a short lunch that consists of "the nastiest stuff I've ever seen," according to Doit 49.
The Ontario driver was quickly rising the ranks in DTR2 and even started winning a few races before these evil people kidnapped him and put him in this weird building filled with other people that were kidnapped. The building Doit 49 finds himself in is a large multi-story structure full of these run-down 6 by 8 rooms.
"There's these guys with guns in here that stand outside of our rooms and everything, man. It's scary," said Doit 49 in an exclusive interview. "They say they are here to protect me but I ain't dumb. I got to find a way out of here and let the cops know what's going on up here.
"They lock every door and I can't go where I wanna go or they threaten to shoot me! It's almost as bad as some of the guys in DTR2!"
A typical day for the "Crazy Canadian" at this rundown location in middle of the woods includes being woke up at 6:00 am by the gunmen and forced to take a shower with a bunch of African-Americans. 49 stated this was one of the few good parts about this place because of the fun game the other victims play when someone drops a bar of soap.
"I mean we just got this little game we play in the showers," said Doit 49 behind a plexiglass wall in our interview. "It's pretty innocent but it's something to pass the time until we can find a way out of this place.
"Bascially you just toss a bar of soap back and forth to another person and the first one to drops it wins. It's a lot of fun."
After the 6:00 am showers the gunmen allow the kidnappees to watch TV or do some other shit until 11:00 am when lunch is served. Lunch usually consists cow feces with a side of stale bread for dipping. Doit 49 credits the food here for losing over thirty pounds in the two months since he woke up in his little room.
"I've lost quite a bit of weight already since they put me here," said Doit 49. "The food is so bad I'd rather eat paint chips from the walls inside my room."
12:00 noon is called count time, where Doit 49 says he just "sits around and plays pocket pool with myself or a couple buddies if I can find some volunteers." After a few hours of doing that, it's Dinner time. Dinner is served at 4:00 pm and is usually the leftover cow feces from lunch since hardly anyone ate it to begin with.
5:00 is here and once again it's count time. Doit 49 says at this time he sits down and watches Oprah and then follows up with his favorite show, Blue's Clues.
6:00 pm is recreation time for the kidnappees. The mean people with guns let the kidnap victims go out and play basketball, feel the grass, and stare at that bright giant glowing thingy in the sky (possibly the sun, unconfirmed).
After a few more hours of wondering around the grounds that the kidnappers have elaborately set up, it's time to go to bed and wake up the next morning and do everything all over again.
"I mean, I don't know what this place is, or how I got here, but it could be worse I guess. If the bad guys had DTR2 here I could see myself come around to this place. But these guys are criminals and if I can find a way out of this place I'm gonna sue their asses for everything they got.
"How can so many people get away with kidnapping like this? These people will pay for this once I escape from this hellhole!"
Doit 49 said one of the gunmen who claim to be some sort of "guard" told him that he would be released in December for his good behavior and his time served in this dungeon-like building.
"I don't believe that shit for a second, man. These guys will tell you anything. I'm not falling for their tricks. I got to find my own way out of here and not believe these lying fools.
"I'm not gonna wait around till December to find out what they are gonna do to me!"
It's unclear if the gunmen are really going to let Doit 49 out of the hellhole in December. If they do, look for the Canadian driver to have to entirely relearn how to drive and cause lots of wrecks again until the next time he is kidnapped by these bad people for not doing anything wrong.
(We love you Tony)